It's not very often that anything interesting happens on a Wednesday.

But this past week was an exception.

I had a date on Wednesday night with CJ.  I was not optimistic.  I met him online and spoke to him for the first time on Tuesday night.  The conversation was filled with awkward silences.  I would say something and pause, waiting for some sort of response from him ... and never get one.  And vice versa.  I would open my mouth to respond ... but couldn't get anything to come out.

So, I half-grudgingly did my hair that morning before work in preparation for the date. 

During work, Val received a text message from a mystery person, asking if she would give me his phone number.  We scoured the internet, trying to find out if the number was in someone's profile.
"Is it Jonnie?"  I asked.
"Hang on," she said, pulling up his profile and comparing the numbers.  "It is!"

Ah, the good ol' days of Jonnie and Ron.  Val and I dated these two best friends until Jonnie basically disappeared, like so many of the guys I like do after about a month.  He resurfaced later with a girlfriend who soon became his fiancee who soon became a lesbian. 

And that's when I get my phone call.  When the girl you ditch me for ditches you for another girl.

I got an email from him. 
"Sorry its been so long since i have tried to talk to you. i switched from nextel to verizon and when i changed phones i lost a lot of numbers and yours was one of them. but maybe if you can forgive me we could start talking again. maybe even get the four of us(me, ron, you and your sister) together like old times. call me sometime if you want"

I thought about telling him no way.  That you can't just disappear on people, reappear whenever it suits you, and expect everything to be fine or "like old times".  But, memories of "old times" made it too hard to pass up.  So, the four of us made plans for Friday.

As I headed to Olive Garden to make my 7:30pm dinner date, I received a text message from CJ asking, "Are you here yet? lol"  It was 7:10pm.
"No ... why?  Are you already there?"

Now, in my three years of single life, here is something I have never encountered.  A guy who is so thoughtful and sweet that he arrives to the restaurant twenty minutes early so that I don't have to wait when I get there.  Why hasn't any other guy thought of this before?  I was impressed already and even more so when I got to the restaurant and he was already seated at the table, an appetizer arriving as I sat down. 

The conversation started off slowly.  That was probably mainly due to the fact that I was too focused on putting the food into my mouth instead of all over my face or in my lap.  Once the dishes were cleared, the conversation picked up.  He asked me if I wanted to go out after dinner, but I declined.
"No, I just want to get this over with ... the first date, I mean ... not that I'm having a bad time or that I'm not interested in you .... just the awkwardness, you know?" 

And that's how I was all night--a stuttering, rambling mess.  I was amazed he wanted to hang out again, but we made plans to get together sometime over the weekend.

On my way home, I talked to my good friend Kate from back home who announced that she was getting married.  I was excited, but also suddenly slightly stressed at the idea of helping Kate and Val both plan their weddings.

As I was laying in bed, I got a text message from the Marine: "U up? i miss u"
"Yes I'm up.  Hope you had a nice time while you were here"
"Wish I would have spent more time with you"

I rolled my eyes, closed my phone, and rolled back over ... but then my phone started ringing.  I debated for a minute before finally picking up. 
"When are you coming to visit me?" he asked.
"I'm not."
"Why not?"
"Umm, because you stood me up?"
"I'm sorry."
"Where were you?  What happened to you?  Why didn't you call?"  I asked, trying to keep from crying.
"I was hanging out with my dad.  You can call him.  He'll tell you.  Will you please call him?"
"No, I don't care where you were.  I care that you didn't call me to let me know.  We had plans.  What do you want from me?  Why do you keep doing this to me?"
"I'm sorry ... Michelle, please move up here and be with me."
"No."
"Michelle, you don't want to marry me anymore?"
"No."
"Please, Michelle, please.  I want to marry you.  I want to be with you.  I want to start my life with you."  He was crying now.  It was hard to hear.
"No, I'm not going to marry someone who can't even call me to let me know where he is.  Do you realize that everything would be fine right now if you just would have called me to tell me where you were?"

After a lot of talking and crying between the both of us, I finally told him that I would think about coming up to visit him, but that he had a lot to prove to me. 

The next day at work, I was getting opinions from all the girls on what I should do and whether I should go.
"Well, I'm definitely not going unless he pays for my gas," I told them.  "I'm not dropping $50 to drive up there and then not be able to get a hold of him.  I would be stuck in NC by myself for the weekend."
"Yeah, and definitely let him know about your date the other night.  Let him know that you're keeping your options open."

But the best advice came from my boss. 
"Do you love him enough to move to North Carolina for him?"
" ... yes?"  We had talked about marriage, but it seemed that we had skipped the part about whether or not we were in love with each other.
She could tell I was uncertain.  "What color are his eyes?"
"Oh my gosh, you know, I have no idea."
"Then, you're not in love."  I thought on that one for a minute when she asked, "Would you die for him?
That one was easy.  The answer came quickly.  "No."  There probably was a time when I would have, but that was gone the first time he stood me up. 
"Would you die for your sister?"
Also easy.  "Yes."
"And your mom?"
"Yes."
"See?  That's love.  That's how my family judges it anyway.  But maybe my family is a little too extreme in how we think about things--"
"No, not at all.  I like that way of thinking."

In fact, it had just cleared everything up for me.  Or so I thought ...